Alas! My child is 4 years old!!.
Today, I have 24 days to my daughter’s 4th birthday. And the crisis began to make itself felt too long ago. Gradually, increasing every day a little more and hurting. But don’t be afraid.
It won’t be easy, but it’s going to end like every problem. I say that you shouldn’t feel guilty because you are angry with your child, but I also know that it is not easy. Because I’m in the middle of
the same situation, and we all family are there .
Let’s first examine the changes in your child. First of all, if you have a daughter like me, to the mother, if you have a son against your father, will be constantly react and rebel, and his reactions will usually be in a moment to shine. However, at this time, his attention may be erratic and he/she may immediately start laughing. You may experience these extreme feelings very often. Do not forget about this distraction, we will use it as a solution.
Also an example of these extreme emotions is a result that you do not expect at all. In fact, you may don’t care about something, but she can cry for ages for it. You might think that you can’t reach her in these situations. For example, you can try to explain why an insect should go home. But at the end, she still asks why it gone. Calm down.
A stubborn child
In an important case, even though you are alerting and telling your child, while looking into your eyes, she can tear the book pour the water, go to a place you don’t want. In these cases, the solutions you have already applied may be desperate. Do not stress.
Will upset you
At any time in his childhood, he tended to hit and finished this period. We lived for a long time. It took about 1 year. But this time is a little different. She can kick or hit you willingly or becuse she is angry with you. Be patient and take care to be calm. In this way, they try to show their personality, trying to show their feelings.
You can hear the sentences like go, don’t come, I don’t like you.She use these sentences because, she knows it has got bad meanings or, it will upset you. She wants to hear your love. In these cases, you can repeat it more frequently or if you have an action together that increases your tie, you can do it. My daughter likes to touch my arm or my face. I let her touch my face in a suitable condition ın those crisis.
After her actions, she can be very upset unexpectedly . She pours water to piss it off and then may be regret. I think you shouldn’t make a lot of comments on the event. After a while comments overwhelms the child.
Lie and fool
And now she try to plays trick you. Because she learnt it. She want to try new things and her abiliities. Be careful to have a soft tongue. Do not be afraid, in most individuals, this behavior does not change to a permanent state. You can also tell him you don’t believe her or that it’s wrong. But you shouldn’t insist to change this behaviour. This type of attitude will make it more permanent. because she will think, it is the most important think and has to continue her behaviour.
There is no theft understanding during this period. She only has the willing to because she wants to take it with her. Of course the business is up to you, again. If you encounter such a situation do not forget to avoid to give sudden reaction, in this age group, they can begin to understand the feelings of the other side and understand the difficult situation. You can simply describe it with various examples.
Now let’s come to the simple solution. Of course, these applications may not be the direct result. There is no such thing as a miracle solution that will take care of everything at once. You must first accept and admit that your child is an special and indiviual. Then, if you apply the following, you will be able to overcome the 4th age crises more easily. Although, nowadays are not easy for some of us, but the important thing is to remember these days will end. Always try to stay calm.
Give her your love.
How is that so easy? I already love her. Of course, your child also knows this and sometimes he just wants to be sure of it once more. When she’s mad at you, she wonders how to react when he says bad words. Now she wants to establish stronger communication and relationship than her previous years. She wants to feed these feelings with these movements. So when she say bad words, remind her that you’re still with him, that you’re a family. In fact, I’m trying to explain to my daughter in such cases, sometimes mothers, fathers, adults can be angry, this is a normal feeling. I give her time to cool off and I hug her. I can already say that this became a habit. Sometimes when she starts crying for no reason, I leave her alone where I can’t communicate. When she wants to talk, I will come back , give her a hug. Sometimes, she comes and she hugs, sometimes she just keeps hugging. It’s such a beautiful feeling you understand me very well if you’ve already read up to here.
She wanted anything, but it’s not possible to do it, sometimes “say no” can escalate the crisis. In such cases, we can hug her, go down to his height and say, “We’re not in the position to do it now, but instead we can …”. So, give another solution instead of concentrade on problem can make easier to get over it. Because when you say no, you can stimulate his sensitive feelings and cause the crisis. Instead, if you take the attention to an activity where you can do more fun and together, you will be passing this crisis period in a short time. In the meantime, I think it is important to convince “the concept of making sth together” because, it will be more interesting to have an activity with youinstead of having fun alone. I think it’s better to pass the event, to convert it to permanent nerve and persistence.
A regular and specific lifestyle
In fact, this title is not specific to this age group. So children want order from birth and like it. Just. In this period. a bit like the order does not care, may seem to be rebelling. Not, not definitively.
Children try to find their personality in every period until adulthood. I think that this is not a situation that ends in adulthood, people who are open to change are aware that our character is always changing, not as much as this period. But this is not the subject of this article. Returning to our subject, the most essential thing for a child trying to find a new habit is the order in the house. Breakfast at home with the family, the father at home at certain hours, the mother’s main attitude is all part of the order. The child reacts differently, but knows what he is going to face, and it gives her confidence. What I mean is to set up strict rigid rules, not to impose these rules on children, but rather to create an order that can stretch when needed. So the boy or girl, who had survived a nervous breakdown, cried for ages, she/he will know that his mood would not be left and that his or her family and their order would be there. Rigid and unflexiable rules only make that situation worse. For this reason, I persistently repeat, calm, interest and understanding. These are the basic keys.
In the meantime, I received teacher training, but of course I am not an expert in child development or psychology. Here I tried to share my personal experiences and knowledge. I hope it’s useful.